Monday, February 15, 2010

I'm just a girl...

Over the past few months I have received all sorts of comments like, "How do you do this", or "Wow, I could never do this, you are wonder-woman. You are an amazing woman of God."

This is a very real post with very real emotions. Maybe not something you may not want to hear from a woman you have been following for so long. A woman that you think is doing this amazing work of God. YES, the work is amazing, but the woman is not, she is just a girl obeying her father.

As you noticed these past few days have been silent..well almost a week now. In fact, my last post I could only muster up a few words and then point you in the direction of a woman, I 100% agree with...I hope you had time to read her post. I have been Amening it ever since. This road has been a major challenge already and doesn't look very hopeful for a quick end.

Adoption is a blessing...but it does not come without a cost. It is not something to be considered lightly, however it is something to be taken seriously. I believe that what the Lord says about adoption is true...I believe He is serious about what He says about widows and orphans. I believe that if we believe that God's word is Spirit breathed, then we must take it all as seriously as He does. However, I also believe that just because the Lord calls us to do something does it mean it won't be hard. The road is sometimes easy and sometimes difficult, but it is best to obey.

The past 4 weeks have held serious emotions and serious challenges. Even when we arrived in Kenya, Satan had set out to destroy, kill and annihilate us and discourage us at the very least. He has thrown us off by a horrible accident in Africa involving our van and a 7 year boy...God healed him. He has tried to discourage and scare us with demonic encounters...God has the victory. He has tried to make us second guess what we were doing and why.
He almost succeeded, until I picked up on his schemes. He has worked hard to take our focus off of Jesus and turn them to our stresses and distractions. Only through God's strength are we able to withstand.

Yesterday alone, I woke early, tried to get quite time to prepare myself for what was ahead, I failed. My almost 5 year old from China, who has only ever one time in her little life with us pooped in her pull up did, with a BIG mess everywhere and a bath at 6:30am. Served 9 children breakfast, including our EXTREMELY picky Ethiopian children who only want bread and bannanas, dispite all of our efforts to make Ethiopian food. I was a short order cook for all 3 meals including snacks ( I can't blame them). Then proceeded to my boys room where all 4 boys reside. Picking up trash off the floor (that is where the trash goes in Africa), wiping pee off of the toilet seats and floors, separating drawers because Eyob and Christopher can't share, then back to the bath room to find poop toilet paper in the trash can, doing yet another lesson in shint-a-bit (for those of you who think that I am cursing, I am not, that is the word for going to the bathroom...fitting I know) anyway, a lesson that provided full re-enactment of going to the toilet, wiping and NOT throwing the poop toilet paper in the trash BUT in the toilet and then flushing it!!!!! (I know that this may be TMI..but it is a reality that I must share). Then off to the girls room, which was pretty decent, only to find out that the girls bathroom smelt like a sewer...you guessed it more shint-a-bit lessons with re-enactment, then scrubbing the poop off of the ornately decorated trash can where the poop, was you guessed it, was in the ornate flowers with toilet paper stuck to it. Now I know what you are thinking...DREA THROW IT AWAY, but I scrubbed it instead. Then down stairs for lunch, where I battled my little African children, they can't eat dabo (bread) for breakfast lunch and dinner AND they must stop telling me NO. Had a MAJOR power struggle with Meskerem, who doesn't take no for an answer...however I won. Then the kids were off to play outside, while I cut my dads hair and took care of his prescriptions by phone. Once the kids were in, I broke up a brawl...YES that is exactly what I mean brawl, not the likely participants...Meskerem and Eyob (brother and sister), complete with blood and broken lip...dealt with 14 year old attitude (no it does not differ just because you came from a different country). Found the phone number of an Ethiopian restaurant owner so that he could translate EXACTLY what I wanted to say to her about nailing her brother in the lip with a flashlight and scratching his skin off with her nails AND not responding to me when I call, SO THAT there was NO misunderstanding....and let me tell you this was only around 2:30 we still had half the day to go. Discouraged...is an understatement to say the very least.

All of this to tell you, when I signed up for this, I did not get any wonder twin power activate ring, or cool red, white and blue leotards. When I spin in circles, it means that I am about to lose my mind, not become a super hero. In fact, sometimes I dream of taking the form of an ice burg, or ball of fire, or maybe an eagle so I can fly away...but it does not work...ever. The last few days I have questioned God...reasoned with him, dreamt of what tomorrow will bring, I have been scared to death, convinced myself it will get better, praised God for three little African beauties, thought of how I could reverse all that we have done, and then come to grips that the Lord did tell me to do this and then resolved to the fact that I am just a girl...obeying her Father. It is a strange reality, but it is true...NONE of this has been possible because of me or anything that I have ever done. It is only possible because God said, I obeyed, and HE alone equips us with what we need to follow it all through. He equips us with Himself.


That is why Paul could with stand and continue to pursue Christ vigorously...He was equipped with Christ and His Holy Spirit, he was obedient and wanted to bring the Lord glory no matter what the Lord allowed...alone he would have failed and retreated from God's mission.


2 Corinthians 11:24-31 "Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my own countrymen, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false brothers. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked. Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches. Who is weak, and I do not feel weak? Who is led into sin, and I do not inwardly burn?
If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness. The God and Father of the Lord Jesus, who is to be praised forever, knows that I am not lying."


2 Corinthians 1:8-11 "We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many."



So one may ask..."Drea, how do you do this. I wish I could do ________ but I just can't, I don't have the time, or the resources, or the patience or the _________. You must be wonder mom. You are an amazing woman of God."

I don't feel amazing, however I do have an AMAZING GOD!!! This road is not easy, but we are all called. We don't have to wait for the heavenly phone to ring...it is in scripture, we must obey and then know that the One who called all of us is faithful and He will do it!

I must remember that I am just a girl...obeying her Father, and my Father is God!



10 comments:

Erica said...

Love you plain old ordinary girl that God has called to love on the least of these. God calls ALL of us, from one plain old ordinary girl to another there is NO PLACE I'd rather be even if its difficult and a really long road. We're HIS and it is our joy and pleasure to serve HIM forever more. Mucho mucho love and hugs, many prayers for all of you.

chalkinscriptions said...

Thank you for your transparency. I already have days like this and our adopted daughter has not arrived yet! But I have four biological ones making a mess and sometimes they put trash on the ground and they are not from Africa. BTW - I would have thrown the flowers out! You are really one amazing woman to clean them....

chalkinscriptions said...

Thank you for your transparency. I already have days like this and our adopted daughter has not arrived yet! But I have four biological ones making a mess and sometimes they put trash on the ground and they are not from Africa. BTW - I would have thrown the flowers out! You are really one amazing woman to clean them....

Christy. said...

Praying for you!!

chalkinscriptions said...

I don't think we had the opportunity to meet. There are eight other families so you probably met one of them. I met Jessie for the first time a month ago when she was out here in CA. But I look forward to reading your "tidbits" and thank you for your prayers. Today I feel a little down because I don't know what the outcome will be with DFW and the kids. No matter what I know we are adopting from Ethiopia....I just don't how God has written the script for us!

Tonya said...

...just a girl who knows who her daddy is! There is not one thing I could say here that you don't already know, so.... I love Jesus in you! and let me know if there is anything I can do to help. Love you!

皮東 said...

Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.............................................

Cindy said...

Oh my goodness. I read this for the second time to Frank this morning. In the midst of a very difficult time, you have an amazing sense of humor, and a way with words. We could not stop laughing. That seems inappropriate, given your topic. But the super-hero stuff was just too much! You are a lovely, amazing girl, and I love you more than words can say. I wish I could come over and just help you. I am thanking God for Zona and Amy and others who are helping shoulder the load. You may not be a super-hero, but you are my hero in many ways :)

Audrey said...

So sorry for how rough this is going for you. Yes, you're obedient. Yes, God will supply your needs. Keep resting in the Truth of His word. Let it refresh and renew your spirit. Praying for you regularly, friend.

Heidi K. said...

Thank goodness His mercies are new every morning!
I will be praying for you and your family!

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23

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